Death website — The website of death — Whoever visits this website dies soon

Death website
Death web­site

You don’t want to die, then nev­er click, not the web­site.  Not now, not lat­er, never.
Oth­er­wise you will be dead with­in 14 days.
Jurors are vying for the Dar­win Award on the Internet.

Par­tic­u­lar­ly grotesque types of death are honored .…..

Death is a bad fate, full of gloom and tragedy. But heart­less natures are cur­rent­ly amus­ing them­selves in abun­dance at the pass­ing of unfor­tu­nate peo­ple, laugh­ing at deaths like that

* of the fiber fun­da­men­tal­ist in Sinai, who emit­ted so much intesti­nal gas due to a per­ma­nent diet of beans, onions and herbs that the oxy­gen con­tent in his tube-like cave fell below the life lim­it — “mors per fla­tum”, death by down­draft, the autop­sy report states ;

* of the hot dog thief in St. Louis who tried to secure his booty by gob­bling it down in one piece — he died a bolus death, as doc­tors call it, when some­one suf­fo­cates on his last bite;

* of the opera singer half asleep, who instead of the tele­phone ring­ing ear­ly in the morn­ing grabbed his revolver from the bed­side table — to the bang the neigh­bors heard a wail that remind­ed of Cavaradossi’s screams of pain (Tosca 2nd act), but until the para­medics came he was already bleed­ing to death;

* of the suit­or, who lost his man­hood in the broth­el, where­upon he tried his hand at the real­ly hot pussies of Philadel­phia — at least this is what the police sus­pect, since the man had com­plete­ly undressed in the lion enclo­sure of the local zoo before his death.

You and many hun­dreds of oth­ers who were des­o­lat­ed by the mis­for­tune are con­tenders for the title in a com­pe­ti­tion in which, at best, dis­re­spect­ful spir­its with a pen­chant for macabre jokes will find plea­sure — who else could be amused by the fate of the diar­rhea-plagued botanist who is inter­est­ed in a Cal­i­for­nia con­ser­va­tion­ist ‑Kliff tried to dis­solve eco­log­i­cal­ly clean into the sea and fell behind on his urge?

The plant lover is con­sid­ered a promis­ing can­di­date for the Dar­win Award 1997 — the prize adver­tised annu­al­ly on the Inter­net for demels who bring their life to extinc­tion ahead of time, but in an unusu­al way. The reg­u­la­tions put it in a more seduc­tive man­ner: “The Dar­win Award is giv­en to those rep­re­sen­ta­tives of the species who have removed them­selves from the human gene pool in the most spec­tac­u­lar and stu­pid way imaginable.”

With joy in the grotesque death that was not cloud­ed by any restraint, the win­ners from all cor­ners of the earth pre­sent­ed so many award aspi­rants that the jury was in default with the fact-check­ing — the rea­son why the free choice of the win­ners for 1997 is still drag­ging on.
But at least the award com­mit­tee has now, appar­ent­ly over­whelmed by the abun­dance of mate­r­i­al, pub­lished an inter­im report on the Inter­net — a real trea­sure trove for moral­i­ty, the sci­ence of stupidity.
From the inter­im report it emerges that self-exemp­tion through non­sense was prac­ticed almost exclu­sive­ly by men in the past year.

The num­ber of vic­tims who died by uri­nat­ing on cur­rent-car­ry­ing cables has risen dra­mat­i­cal­ly — most­ly when a man donat­ed in the course of climb­ing high-volt­age pylons;

but often also when urg­ing bridges or plat­forms onto the over­head line or con­duc­tor rails of the rail­ways or subways.

The Pol­ish poach­er who had elec­tri­fied a fish pond and then felt the urge to water deserves spe­cial men­tion in the area of ​​uri­nal elec­tro­cu­tion; he was found dodg­ing next to his broth­er, who had appar­ent­ly run into the pond to save him — he was also a can­di­date, albeit not nec­es­sar­i­ly a com­pelling can­di­date, for the award, which is nat­u­ral­ly giv­en posthumously.

The only excep­tion are the vic­tims of auto-emas­cu­la­tion, as the doc­tor calls self-cas­tra­tion in men, who are no longer able to pass on their genes and are there­fore enti­tled to par­tic­i­pate in the award accord­ing to the reg­u­la­tions. Occa­sion­al­ly, there are sex­u­al grat­i­fi­ca­tion attempts, such as the self-emp­ty­ing man, who — unusu­al for this award cat­e­go­ry — is in sec­ond place in the pre­lim­i­nary over­all ranking.
He was nom­i­nat­ed by the oper­at­ing doc­tor, to whom the patient had been trans­ferred with a bal­loon-like swollen scro­tum with­out tes­ti­cles. As the x‑ray clear­ly showed, there were 80 met­al clips in the scrotum.
Expla­na­tion: Dur­ing the auto-eroti­cism on the dri­ve belt of a band saw, the man tore open his scro­tum and sta­pled the scro­tum, which had been emp­tied after los­ing his tes­ti­cles, with an office stapler.

The absolute favorites for first place in the Dar­win Awards 1997 are the two heavy met­al fans who want­ed to climb over the 2.70 meter high fence to the open-air con­cert of the band “Metal­li­ca” via the back of their pick­up truck.
With­out real­iz­ing that it was twelve meters down the oth­er side, the first of the coarse drunk­en duo stepped over the fence;
But he did not con­sid­er it a stroke of luck that he got caught in a tree with his jack­et halfway



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